12:13 a.m. - 2012-01-24
laugh at my pain
My boyfriend is kiiiiiind of an idiot. :-/
I say this for a lot of reasons lol.but mostly b/c he doesn't think about how the things he does/says affect our relationship BEFORE he does 'em..
I went home this weekend to celebrate my brother's birthday (more on that in a sec).When i came back i asked him how his wknd was,etc.Did you party?Did you have ppl over?Anything exciting happen?etc,etc.
This is why i can't trust him:he tried to invite one of his girl co-workers(whom he knows i don't like/would not like in our house) to come over and smoke with him and our roommate.Granted,having the third person there helps....but just the fact that you KNOOOOOWWW i don't like her and have this bitch up in my house!?Craziness. -.- (lol sorry i went ghetto there for a sec,bringing it back a bit now...>)
Anywho,the weekend-on my end-went okay.Friday I went down and just hung around with the fam.Saturday we had a family breakfast brunch with a bunch of cousins and such to celebrate my OTHER brother being home for a couple of days as well.Then later that night my youngest bro was turning 16.
My mom had rented out a hall,had a dj,and then my other brother had paid for a rapper.These little kids show up...and omigod,some of the girls were wearing skirts that I wouldn't wear X-p This one girl-we called her sparkly butt-literally had on a dress that just barely covered her ass.If she sat down you could see it all.We eventually made her put on a jacket X-p That and apparently one of the other girls was booty dancing with every boy-which we'd alrdy said beforehand was a no-no.And she even tried to dance with the 30 yr old rapper X-p Talk about skanklaicious.I can't believe kids these days.I can only hope my daughter will grow up to have more sense in her head....once i have a daughter that is X-p
Sooooo...i hadn't written in awhile. >.> A lot of things happened and i just kind of shutdown instead of writing it out/talking it out with close friends like i normally do.Part of that has to do with the fact that i don't really hang out with my friends anymore since it's gotten colder.I don't drive so it's just a lot harder for me to get around,unfortunately.That and I lost my job in December so i haven't had much money either.If you've read my earlier post you'll know it was for a bullshit reason...BUT!What's done is done and i don't want to work there anywho.The funny thing about it is that the manager who's been causing all the problems FINALLY got fired X-p I just wish it had been before i got fired :-/
That and....i recently found out i was pregnant....which the boyfriend didn't really take a liking to so THAT'S taken care of -.- The "funny" thing about that is that when i originally told him he was like "well....we can have a baby".and i was like awww<3 i told him that i wanted to at least meet with the doctors and see what they said tho.And after i got back from the doctors-2 days later-he decides to change his mind.I was like-wait....what happened to the support?And he mentioned something about being optimistic then but that he just can't handle a baby right now.It's whatev tho.
I was kinda peeved tho.I mean....someday i really WOULD like a child.And....idunno.Not that my biological clock is ticking-i'm still under 30-but it does get harder as you get older.I mentioned to Ty that we'd decided not to have the baby but that i still wanted to have a baby.She seemed surprised,which i found funny X-p She asked me if I thought I was ready for a baby now to which i replied,"Are any of us EVER really ready for a baby"?To which she said,"Good point lol". X-p And it's true!No matter how much you save up/how stable you think your relationship is/no matter how much of a support system you have in place.....shit happens.It's life.
I dunno....it's just another sign that maybe this boy isn't the right one for me.I'd prefer a man :-/
Too bad it only took me 8 years to realize it X-p
-----/sigh,
indi
p.s.This diary's entry is from
Kevin Hart's standup special.If
you haven't seen it yet,i would
highly recommend it :-p
p.s.s.sorry about the length of this one...just catching up!
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